INTERVIEW WITH AN AUTOFELLATOR
Simply put, Al Eingang, the star of such films as "The Young Man
From Nantucket," "Because He Can," and "Blown Alone," makes his living
sucking himself off. His website Solo
Suck contains several stills from his videos, autobiographical material,
a How-To, and various other notes from the self-sucking world. The following
interview, as you might guess, contains especially sexually explicit language,
because, well, it's about the technique of sucking oneself off, but it
also contains observations about what it's like to do yourself in the mouth,
ass, and ear, and how such action extends into the realms of sexuality,
politics, and pure pleasure etc.
Q: Dogs lick their balls because they can. Do you suck your own
cock simply because it's something you can do?
A: As a sexually curious adolescent (and is there really any
other kind?) who also happened to be unusually flexible it was, I think,
inevitable that my cock would end up in my mouth. I also grew up in a house
with a copy of the Kinsey Report floating around, but can't remember clearly
whether reading Kinsey's short section on autofellatio was a call-to-action
or just an interesting affirmation that what I was doing was not unheard
of. Of one thing I am entirely certain: the marriage of my cock and mouth
was a match made in paradise, and from the very first time that my tongue
caressed my glans I was hooked. Do I suck my own cock simply because it's
something I can do? No; I suck it elaborately because it's something
I can do.
Q: As per the Nantucket limerick, if your ear were a cunt would
you fuck it?
A: I have, in fact, stuck my cock in my ear in the throes of
passion, but it didn't do a whole lot for me. If I were to agree to this
ear-to-cunt transformation would my ear menstruate? If so, I think I would
politely decline the surgery. I have though, I think, stuck just about
every part of my body that is stickable into the other parts that are stick-into-able
and enjoyed, if not the sensations at least the novelty and occasional
ridiculousness of it all. Cock-in-ass, A+; hand-in-ass, not for every day
but exquisite nonetheless; foot-in-ass (just the toes, really), an amusing
diversion; toes-in-mouth; pinky-tip in urethra; nipples in mouth; nipples
in piss-slit, and many more; all enjoyable parts of a normal, red-blooded
boy's exploration of the erotic-possible. Being largely a homo, I would
probably be more likely to be seduced by my ear if it were an asshole,
but again, the disadvantages of what came out of it would certainly outweigh
the pleasure of any congress that I might have with it.
Q: A man who gives himself a nightly handjob is not considered gay.
But, for some reason, sucking yourself off and swallowing your own cum
seems a little more homoerotic than autoerotic. What do you think?
A: While I identify as Queer (I stopped identifying with the
"gay" label on the day that I first heard of the Log Cabin Republicans)
my penis is all-man, 100% straight and none of that fag stuff, OK? Everybody
knows that a straight guy will stick it into anything that's warm, wet,
and reasonably maggot-free, and my hetero-cock is no exception. If there
was any pussy around he'd be on it like white on rice, but a man's gotta
take his satisfaction where he finds it, y'know?
Being a child of the '60s, I imbibed theories of the polymorphous-perverse
and of the fluidity of gender and sexuality with my mother's milk. Now
that all of these Queer Theory whippersnappers have revived these ideas
with new and much harder to pronounce names, I sound like less of a relic
when I argue that gender and sexual orientation are socially constructed
elaborations on whatever inborn tendencies and drives we might have. The
narrow binary of gay vs. straight is a prison (and you know what men get
up to with each other in prison). Is it homoerotic for a man to suck his
own cock? Etymologically it would seem more so than if he were to suck
another man's cock, and yet, hetero means "different" and sucking
yourself off is pretty different, so maybe it’s really a heteroerotic act.
I have a Bulletin Board on my website and get a fair number of posts
from straight guys who suck themselves, some of whom are concerned about
the homo or heterocity of the act, and others who are smart enough to skip
that shit and worry about the important questions: how do I get more of
it in my mouth, and is it really possible to fuck my ass with my own cock?
On a cautionary note, I do also get posts from formerly 100% hetero
guys who, having tasted the heavenly manna of their own cocks are now finding
themselves wondering what it would be like to suck another guy, so there
may be a slippery-slope (slippery-shaft?) effect at work here.
Q: The self-consuming snake, ouroboros, is an ancient symbol
of infinity and fertility. The Egyptian God Amon created the world by eating
his cum. Do you feel more in touch with mythology whilst shining your knob?
Is autofellatio a quasi-religious ritual or are you just sucking yourself
A: Who can say for sure which ancient God one most resembles?
As I say in the shocking autobiographical essay on my website; I'm sure
that my childhood sojourn with the Secret Order of Tibetan Monks, and my
kidnapping by a troupe of chimps as a babe have had some influences on
my psyche, but it is the place of the Professional Alienists and of future
historians to say what those effects were. Perhaps "a quasi-religious,
just-sucking-myself-off ritual with a shallow, mythic quality" best describes
Q: In terms of fertility, have you ever worried about eating watermelon
seeds and then growing a watermelon-type humanoid in your stomach? The
pregnancy would make future solosuck sessions very difficult. Thoughts?
A: I will not even dignify this ridiculous query with a response.
I do however worry about the butt-babies that might result from fucking
myself in the ass and always use the rhythm method to determine those times
of the month when it is safe to plow my mangina with my massive fuck-stick
and fill my hungry hole with a hot load of baby batter.
Q: What kind of thoughts do you get from the activity? Have you
ever had any worthwhile realizations?
A: Aside from that nagging feeling that all of the details of
the Unified Field Theory would come into clear focus if I could just bend
a little further and rim myself? "Worthwhile"ness being essentially a subjective
quality I will say yes: "Oh yeah! If I twist my head to the side while
I thrust, my throat rubs on my cockhead in a completely different way"
seems to me far more worthwhile than anything that I've ever heard coming
out the mouth of a career politician. "Oh Fuck, I love my cock" far superior
to any of the body-hating propaganda endlessly spewing from every orifice
of corporate media and the Judeo-Christian morality cops.
Q: Is solosucking purely sexual? Does it also involve a related
A: When I was 17 or 18, I was walking down the street with my
friend Aaron. We were talking politics and he said "I suppose if I was
going to call myself anything I'd say I'm a Marxist." I said "Well, I guess
I'm an anarchist." It just popped out; I don't remember having given it
any conscious thought before that moment, but I was right, and that conversation
was the first step in my eventual immersion in the anarchist movement and
the promulgation of anarchist ideals.
Anarchism is certainly an extreme political position; did twisting my
body into the extreme positions required for autofellatio influence my
mind’s bent towards an extreme political philosophy? If I were an individualist
anarchist then the solitary, self-sufficient nature of autofellatio would
be a pretty obvious match with the politics, but being more disposed towards
a basically anarcho-communist politic I would have to say that any direct
link between the nature of the acts and the politics is pretty tenuous.
I do have the pleasure of saying "I suck my own cock for a living" to
people who ask me what I do, and I would consider that to be a political
statement. Working for myself, doing something that I love and that I'm
very good at is political. Defining the self-suck videos that I make as
Art; as much as the sculpture
and other more traditional art objects that I create; that's political.
The only real problems I have with what I do are the environmental impact
and the capitalist milieu in which I have to operate. I sell big hunks
of toxic plastic that were manufactured by horribly exploited workers in
terrible conditions in the "Third World." I'm not happy about that, but
all money is dirty money and doing the videos gives me the free time to
make art and work for a better world.
Q: Were you able to do it (suck yourself off) right away? Or did
it take some hard work and perseverance?
A: First time; half of my cock in my mouth, no problem. It did
take a while to get the whole thing in, though.
Q: Have you ever thought about doing a self-help video about the
wonders of autofellatio? Do you ever guide those who post messages on your
board? Do you have any basic advice for beginners?
A: "Solo-suck for the Soul"? "I'm OK, You're Unnecessary"? "How
To Be Your Own Best Blowjob"? Imagine the infomercial! I have a "How-To"
page on my website that gives what little advice I have to give. I never
had to learn, so I don't think I'm the best person to teach those for whom
it doesn't come naturally. I do my best to offer advice and encouragement
to those who ask for it, but it's really all there in my “How-To.”
Q: When you're feeling good about yourself, do you suck more tenderly?
When you're disappointed, do you take it out on yourself?
Q: When you manually masturbate, there's typically very little thrusting.
In an act that involves both sucking and thrusting, however, does your
mind master what's going on between your mouth or your cock? Do you tend
to fuck yourself harder? Or suck yourself harder?
A: Imagine having someone suck on your cock who knows exactly
what you're feeling at every moment; who can adjust every variable instantly
to provide you with maximum pleasure. Imagine (this one is going to be
more of a stretch for non-cocksuckers) sucking on the cock of a man who
knows exactly how hard and fast to push, and when to pull out (for those
of us who still have a gag-reflex). Having that much control means that
I can have a variety of kinds of orgasms and can easily separate orgasm
from ejaculation, and shoot a number of loads before having the final orgasm.
It isn't a substitute for sex with other people; it's a completely different
thing, like masturbation squared. It's like any good sex: Sometimes it's
cerebral, sometimes the body takes over.
Q: Has the sexual self-sufficiency made you aloof, egotistical,
A: What makes you think you have right to intrude on my privacy
and ask me, The Master, such an impertinent question? Paying me silent
tribute (preferably in unmarked bills to my Swiss bank account) and allowing
me to continue to bask in my own magnificence, while a pale and frustrating
substitute for actual contact with Me is all that you deserve.
Q: And just for kicks, what's the last novel you read?
A: Paul Lussier's Last
Refuge of Scoundrels. An enjoyable retelling of the American Revolution
as an extended crime-of-passion by ordinary people, with delightfully unflattering
portraits of many of the "Founding Fathers."