EYESHOT'S RETRACTED CONTRIBUTION TO THE NEAL POLLACK ROAST
BY WILMER WILDEBEESTBREAST
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The roast has been removed. I apologize for offending anyone who was offended. There is too much trouble in the world to spend time causing more trouble. Again, I apologize to all readers who wasted precious time on this earth reading my vile blather when they could have been doing anything else at all enjoyable. I apologize to Neal in particular for everything. And I apologize to myself for devoting energies to an entirely worthless, acrid endeavor. Today I'm like the Grinch on Christmas morning. Please - let's all join hands and sing a song of peace and goodwill. As the great American poet George Clinton once said somewhere on Funkadelic's "Maggot Brain" album: "Good thoughts bring forth fruit. Bullshit thoughts rot your meat . . . Free your mind and your ass will follow. The kingdom of heaven is within." |
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