submit or we'll show you the surface of jupiter in the corrugated paint of an urban wall and you better believe it's a little slice of Jupiter right here on earth, baby

The Universe is a big place. It's so big, it's not even a place. It is the sum of all places.

A Polygobber is a particular kind of being that lives in the Universe. They live on Planet Go-Go. Planet Go-Go is a pink planet.

All the Polygobbers on Planet Go-Go are intelligent. They are superhighlyintelligentbeings. They like to invent technologies to make their lives simpler. They build telescopes that let them look toward the edges of the Universe. Besides inventing new things and being supersmart, they also like to walk around in dainty outfits and compliment each other's shoes.

A Bistrengulator is a particular kind of being that lives in the Universe also. They live on Planet Mo-Mo. Planet Mo-Mo is a blue planet.

All the Bistrengulators on Planet Mo-Mo are physically strong. They like to lift heavy things. They build large structures and live like kings. They keep things simple. Also, besides being physically capable of sturdy construction, they like to play violent sports. They like to play a game called deathball. At the end of a game of deathball, the loser is beheaded. After this happens, the crowd emphatically cheers.

On both Planet Go-Go and Planet Mo-Mo, no change in population ever occurs. This is because they are all immortal. Due to their immortality, there is no desire for sexual activity amongst any of the Polygobbers or the Bistrengulators. Their individual life spans are much like the size of the Universe.

Now, the Polygobbers know all about the Bistrengulators. They spy on them with their large telescopes. But the Bistrengulators know nothing of the Polygobbers. Bistrengulators are ignorant of what is beyond Planet Mo-Mo. They are happy enough just building tall structures and watching games of deathball. The Polygobbers, however, are very curious of the Bistrengulators on Planet Mo-Mo. They hold academic symposiums and write non-fiction books on the life and customs of the Bistrengulators.

One day, all the Bistrengulators got bored. They all said, "I'm bored!"

"What shall we do to cure our boredom?" shouted one.

"Let's build a giant building!" answered another one.

"Yes! The biggest building we've ever built!"

"But what shall we use it for?"

"I don't know!"

"Let's build it!"

And they all agreed it was a great idea.


A year later on Planet Go-Go, a Polygobber was watching the blue Planet Mo-Mo through their giant telescope and noticed a large structure sticking out of the side of the planet.

"Hey, come look at this giant structure sticking out of the side of Planet Mo-Mo!"

"That's amazing! What is it?"

"I think it's a building."

"What's it for?"

"I don't know."

But then, while they all took turns marveling at the long thing sticking out of the side of Planet Mo-Mo, a go-go-quake occurred. They all ran for shelter.

After the go-go-quake and subsequent aftershocks, the Polygobbers went out to survey the damage. Here is what they found: a very, very large crack along the surface of their pink planet.


When the Bistrengulators built their giant building on the surface of Planet Mo-Mo, they didn't plan it very carefully. They didn't like to do math or engineering, so they hadn't anticipated that the balance of orbital spin of Planet Mo-Mo would be shifted off track when the giant building was constructed. Over the course of the next year, they spun more and more out of control and were eventually flung from their orbit, hurling through space.

The Polygobbers were aware that Planet Mo-Mo was getting closer and closer to them.

"What will we do?" they all said.

"We're all going to die!"

And then the two planets collided, shoving the giant building of Planet Mo-Mo into the long pink crack of Planet Go-Go. And all the Polygobbers and all the Bistrengulators died, finally relieved of their burden of immortality.

And the conjoined Planets Go-Go and Mo-Mo never separated and spun away like a pink and blue baby’s toy toward the edge of the Universe.

[Forever after at


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